Posted by: Anne | January 18, 2014

no hits, no runs, no errors

Miss Jones, an elderly spinster, lived in a small Midwestern community. She had the notoriety of being the oldest resident of the town. One day she died and the editor of the local newspaper wanted to print a little caption commemorating Miss Jones’ death.

However, the more he thought about it, the more he became aware that while Miss Jones had never done anything terribly wrong, she had never actually done anything of note.

The editor went down to have his morning coffee and met the owner of the headstone establishment in the little community. The headstone proprietor said that he was having the same problem. He wanted to put something on Miss Jones’ headstone besides: Miss Nancy Jones, born such and such a date and died such and such a date, but he couldn’t think of anything of notoriety.

The editor decided to go back to his office and assign the first reporter he came across the task of writing up a small article suitable for both the paper and the headstone. When he returned to the office, the only reporter there was the young and brand new sports editor, so he gave him the assignment.

They say that if you pass through that little community you will find the following statement on her headstone:

“Here lie the bones of Nancy Jones.
For her, life held no terrors.
She lived a maid, died a maid.
No hits, no runs, no errors.”

When you play, sometimes you lose. But if you don’t play, you’ll never win… and maybe you lose by default.

[Story seen various places; above version is from:

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