Posted by: Anne | May 21, 2016

nobody ‘always’ or ‘never’s

Stop Saying ‘Always’ and ‘Never’

Megan Freed, co-founding attorney at Hartford, Connecticut-based Freed Marcroft, LLC, says two words create the most arguments at her practice: ‘always’ and ‘never.’

“Many people will say that their spouse ‘never’ listens to them,” she says. “That statement practically insists that their spouse will immediately fire back with: ‘I’m stuck listening to you right now, aren’t I?'”

She says that by taking those words out of heated discussions or day-to-day bickering, you lower the risk that it’ll turn into a big, blowout argument. “Those words don’t accomplish the intended goal of your spouse understanding how you feel about something,” she says. Instead of saying “you never compliment me how you used to-are you still attracted to me?” Freed says, put yourself into the situation instead. You can say, “Remember that time we went to the food market and walked around downtown? You made me feel so beautiful that day.”

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